From Penny Candy to Haute Couture Chocolate

Welcome to Sacred Musings, a space where I share reflections from the heart on love, life, caregiving, and the lessons that shape us into who we are. My hope is that these words bring comfort, perspective, and inspiration to anyone walking their own path of healing and growth.

I grew up on Penny Candy. Little paper bags full of cheap sweetness. You didn’t need much just a few coins and you could walk out with a treasure. Everybody could afford it. Everybody had it.

Now I’m grown, and I find myself in these haute couture chocolate shops. The kind of places where each piece is $10, $30, sometimes $200 for a box. Vosges Haute Chocolates are my thing. Spices like cayenne folded into dark chocolate, flavors that not everyone even likes, but I do. I love them so much I save up for them, I buy them at the end of the year, and I even give them away when I really, really want someone to know I appreciate them.

That’s what I want for myself. To stop living like I’m some penny candy that anyone can grab, chew up, and throw away. I want to see myself like those Vosges chocolates rare, valuable, layered, not for everyone, but worth it for the people who can really appreciate me.

This ties into what I’ve been sitting with in SLAA. I sit in those groups, I listen to people talk about their chaos, their recovery, their lifelong battle. It’s humbling and sad because I know I’m not any different. I know I’m going to have moments where I spiral, where I’m powerless, where I give in. And I already have. A couple nights ago I was out of control. Last night I was powerless. I slipped. But here’s where I’m trying to shift: I’m not going to sit here and flog myself with shame. I’ll keep showing up. Because I’m done being penny candy.

I’m haute couture chocolate now.

Gotcha.